Planning for People Who Hate Planning (Yes, That’s Me Too)
- Tori Flores
- Aug 30
- 4 min read
Updated: Sep 21
If you’ve ever bought a fancy planner, written on two pages, and then immediately abandoned it to the depths of your tote bag - hi, you’re in the right place. 🙋♀️ Planning is supposed to make life easier, but for people like us, it often feels like one more trap that steals our energy.
I don’t hate planning itself. What I hate is being locked into rigid itineraries and color-coded schedules that don’t leave space for mood swings, surprise opportunities, or plain old “nah, I don’t feel like it.” This post is for the rest of you who feel the same: welcome to planning for people who hate planning.
Why Traditional Planning Doesn’t Work for Everyone
I’ve tried it all: paper planners, whiteboard calendars, cute notebooks with stickers and tabs. Every single one turned into a mess of erased days, missed details, or sticky notes that fell off at the worst moment. My racing thoughts would laugh in the face of a perfectly neat grid.
The truth? For neurodivergent brains, the cuter and more rigid the system, the less likely it is to stick. We need flexibility and forgiveness, not perfection.
My Real-Life Barriers to Planning
Here’s what makes planning tricky for me (and maybe for you, too):
Racing thoughts. I always know that by the time something arrives, I might feel different about it. (Spoiler: I almost always do.)
The “just stay home” brain. Even when I know an event will be fun (like my homeschool co-op), my brain whispers, “Wouldn’t sweatpants and no small talk be easier?”
Mood vs. motivation. It’s not that I don’t want to go or do things - it’s just that my energy and mood rarely line up with what’s on the calendar.
Sound familiar? Yep. That’s why planning for people who hate planning has to look different.
What Actually Works for Me: My Google Calendar + Sticky Note Combo
My winning system is a mix of digital and low-tech:
Google Calendar with reminders. Everything goes in here, immediately. I set two reminders - one the day before and one two hours before. This saves me from missed appointments and a lot less of “oh no, was that today?!” moments.
Family invites. Everyone in my house gets the event invite - yes, even my kids. They’re learning to check their own calendars instead of asking me twenty times what’s happening this week.
Color coding (but practical). My colors don’t mean “work/family/fun.” They mean where the thing is happening: swimming, park, mom’s house, “cannot miss,” or “optional and possibly cancelable.”
Google Tasks for work. If an email includes something I need to do, I click “Add to Tasks.” It links right to the email, and I can quickly and easily add a due date.
Sticky notes. Super-sticky ones for the little “don’t forget” items that don’t belong on a full calendar.
It’s not fancy, but it works. And that’s the whole point.
Sparkle Bursts and Grocery Planning for People Who Hate Planning
The only time I get a real planning “sparkle burst” is when I’m making my two-week meal and grocery plan. That’s because it directly (and seriously) impacts our budget. Coffee, pen, paper, computer - that’s my ritual. I even order groceries for pickup because it keeps me laser-focused on cost and helps me avoid impulse buys.
That’s the thing: planning for people who hate planning doesn’t have to cover everything. Sometimes it’s just about focusing on the areas where planning pays off the most.
My Funniest Planning Fail
One time I bought the cutest (and most expensive) planner from a boutique shop—stickers, tabs, dot pages, the works. I wrote in it for two days before realizing the oversized binder discs meant it wouldn’t even fit in my teacher bag. Into the pile it went. A teacher friend ended up adopting it like it was a puppy she always wanted. I was relieved, and she was ecstatic. Win-win. 😂
Tips for Fellow Planning-Haters
If you’re in the “I don’t hate planning, I just hate how people expect me to do it” club, here are my top tips:
Put it in your calendar right away. Future You will forget.
Plan flexibly. Maybe your calendar shows just one day at a time instead of the whole overwhelming month.
Use reminders generously. Two reminders per event minimum.
Be willing to reset. If a system fails, don’t shame yourself - just try something different.
Mix tools. It’s okay to use Google Calendar and sticky notes and a Kanban board if that’s what works. Or have a list of tools that have worked for you in the past, so when you get bored with one, you can quickly switch to another. Small wins, remember?
When Plans Fall Apart
In my house, failed plans don’t spell disaster. We take them in stride. If my daughter misses out on something she really wanted (like her free summer school lunch), I try to swap in something comparable - like McDonald’s on a whim. It’s not the same, but it’s close enough to smooth the disappointment.
That’s the beauty of flexible planning: it bends instead of breaking.
TL;DR
Planning doesn’t have to mean rigid planners, color-coded sticker charts, or guilt. For people like us, it’s about catching things before they slip away, keeping it flexible, and giving ourselves grace when moods and energy don’t line up with the schedule.
You don’t hate planning - you just hate the kind that boxes you in. Find your own rhythm, use the tools that fit your brain, and remember: every reset counts.
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